Friday, May 6, 2011

pondering

Zeke felt like he was missing out on something. He just wasn't sure what it was. Of course, all he did lately was classes, work, sleep. There was no down-time. And a part of him felt he was on a crash course to no where.

"Should I be worried?" Zeke couldn't tell if these were panic attacks he was having or something horribly wrong with him. He felt useless. He just wasn't there for Caitlin like he expected. In his head, he envisioned evenings of reading his favorite childhood books to 'the stomach'..but that hadn't happened yet. He hadn't even mentioned it to Caitlin who seemed far more interested in what was happening on RJ Berger than even class, lately.

He grabbed the plate that Megan had made for him at supper. She was online trying to apply for a summer job at a day camp. She told him she was sick of being a so-called nanny.

"Maybe you're just making IT out to be a problem, when there isn't one?" He shrugged. She looked up at him puzzled.

He didn't like this feeling. It was a sad feeling, in fact. He didn't want to have it, but it was there. He guessed it was worse when it woke him at two in the morning. His heart beating like thunder in his ears. He had in his mind set...thats when it would happen. Perhaps the baby would come at two in the morning, and he wanted to be ready. He broke down and told Megan ...all of this as she forked through the one pot meal.

"Zeke, relax." She got up and came up behind him and squished his shoulders with her finger tips. He almost jumped. That was not relaxing him, in the least. Zeke gritted then. He hoped Megan wasn't planning on being a masseuse. How did Smed do it? Being with Megan.

"What-what kind of camp counselor are you going to be?" Zeke thought he'd stop asking questions about his predicament. He would just hunker down and keep busy.

"Oh, Drama. Its something to do with drama crap." She made a face when she said it. Zeke really didn't see Megan getting the job.

"Have you acted before?" He looked at her wide eyed as he played with the quick mashed potatoes from a box on top of the so-called shepherd pie.

"Well, a little. I was in Alice in Wonderland in middle school. It was a bit part." She sighed. "And I worked on a few productions in high school before I met Craig. I was the bitch of props my sophomore year for Romeo and Juliet."

"That's..that's a plus." He guessed.

"I used to take dance." She smiled. "But I was seven then."

Zeke just nodded and tried to eat the ground beef dinner. He did his best to have happy thoughts about Caitlin and the baby. If only he could be more like Smed, he thought. If only.

6 comments:

ellie said...

Interesting conversation. I wonder if she'll get the job.

Cafe Fashionista said...

Fingers crossed that they hire her! :)

lucy and sarah said...

Oh, poor Megan. I kind of laughed when I thought of her giving Zeke a back rub.

ivy's closet said...

I do wonder how that'll turn out.

Cait said...

Zeke might have to find her a job.

molly said...

I hope Zeke is doing OK..with everything.