A part of Timo didn't want to give his real mother the time of day. He knew if Hattie wasn't here to walk him through this he would have just tossed that letter from the get go. He guessed.
Still the more he thought about it, he didn't really know his mother's face. He didn't even know her hair color.
In his head, all he could think of was the nuns and how they'd treated him. It was awful. Or so he thought. He wasn't exactly cooperating, either..as he recalled.
"Why didn't she send me a picture?" His throat ached just with the idea that he might not ever know what she looked like.
"She will." Hattie wiped his bangs away from his eyes, as if she needed to know what he was thinking.
"I dunno. Its just...confusing.." He winced. Still not sure what to believe. He didn't like his Dad. He didn't want to be his Dad. "What if.." He didn't want to finish the sentence, but he couldn't fight Hattie, either. Besides, they were where they wanted to be..in their room.
This was the past. Letters from a mother he didn't know. Hattie was the future. He couldn't really ruin that. He didn't want to.
His iPhone went off. He reached for it.
"Guess what!" An excited voice said. "Our film made it to the local film festival."
"Really?" Timo couldn't help but smile. He'd practically forgotten about the silly film he'd helped with a few months ago in the dead of winter. It wasn't exactly a dark film, but it was mainly made in the dark. He couldn't possibly see it trending anywhere. He'd helped two college guys who wrote scripts at the nearby radio station.
"They want us there on a panel."
"You, gotta be kidding me." It was rush. He couldn't stop grinning.
"Its gonna be awesome. I think you might be the STAR of the film festival." His film pal Steve told him.
Timo didn't know what to say. Yet, a part of him felt he'd always be typed cast.
"What are you going to do?" Hattie was excited for him when he got off the phone and told her the news.
"Nothing." He shrugged. What was there to do?
"Don't say that. Where's your ambition?" She was all smiles as she embraced him.
"Its not a big deal." He sighed. He thought of the one time some old lady down at General Dollar recognized him in the short lived soap opera he was once in. He figured she was his only fan. She'd even said he made the most complex character.
"But, I'm going to be on Steve's radio show." He shrugged.
"As a guest?" Hattie grinned more.
"No. He needs somebody to talk politics when. You know, stuff that matters." Timo wasn't sure he was up for the challenge. Thank God, there would be a script to follow, but he would be put on the spot to make it sound natural. "But, it'll be a little money on the side."
"You know, you like the attention." Hattie tugged at his belt loops as if she might be ready to dance around their room.
Really, this was the only stage Timo wanted. Still the outside world was there for the picking. Even still, so many pitfalls.
"Look, we'll get a real picture taken together. And..and maybe we can figure out the German stuff online." He was back to thinking about his real mother again. She needed to know him if he was ever going to know her.