I wanted to leave him, I needed a reason

 

Vada was relieved when Justin got the message from Ari. They couldn't stay. Something had come up.

"I wonder what that was about," Rico was still on bed rest. He'd returned home yet it felt as if he was under house arrest and his dad was his prison guard. Vada knew his dad didn't trust her. But he was home getting over pneumonia. 

Naturally, Carmen was her cheerful self bringing him magazines and snacks. Vada hadn't thought to bring Rico anything. Did Carmen care more for him than she did?

He didn't say much to her. She didn't ask much of him either. And Justin..oh Justin. He left her in a fret.

"You sure, you're over him?" Rico asked once they were gone.

"What?" She was frantic. "Of course, I am." But she nursed her thumbnail and almost ripped it into the quick. She cringed at the thought of him. She was glad he was out of her life. Of course, he looked like a lump on a log now. Maybe Carmen had sedated him into a monk or something.

She knew nothing was going on between them. After all, Carmen had this aura that she was pure as the  driven snow. Vada couldn't shake the thought.

"It's all right if you want to get back together with him," Rico said he'd heard from Eric that Justin wasn't a pothead. Sure, he got nervous at those photoshoots, but things like that didn't happen there.

Vada would not believe any of it. She was sticking to her own facts about Justin, the loser in her book.

"I'm going to teach skating on Saturdays," Rico said once he got back on his feet. "They can't find anyone."

"Why would anyone-" She wanted to say, "want to even skate." But she knew she might hurt his feelings. Maybe she couldn't control anything about Rico. Hell, she hadn't even gotten him in bed. 

She knew the possibilities, but he just wanted to be the disco boy at the skating rink. Didn't he know he could be so much more? Especially, with her help.

"I thought you were going to move in with me," she was even-lipped.

"Oh, I dunno," Rico shook his head. "I need to get better." He told her he would focus on staying healthy and at home.

It sounded like a dead end to Vada. She didn't want to move on and leave Rico behind. She hated that he made her feel so miserable.